Episode Notes

A stirring rendition of silver bells kicks off our hosts first ever Christmas Spectacular! The girls are festive as fuck with poinsettia wreaths and tiny gift boxes on their heads. After Carla is called out for denying basic rights like food and water and red wine, Delia discusses her would be rider. Through the power of positive thinking Delia looks forward to meeting her llama named Sassy. This episode is like Hallmark romance with a little more balls slapping ass and the places we’ll put mistletoe this year to foster an all new Christmas traditions. We hope you never look at this holiday the same way again. In this ABSOLUTELY NOT kid friendly show the girls explore the wide world of Christmas fetishes as outlined in the article by Harmon Leon. Carla comes clean about a gentlemen she liked who dressed as St. Nick and gave her a hitch in her get-a-long. Delia explores why this time of year may breed fetishes… sitting on laps and a naughty/nice list. The girls explore a particularly interesting fetish which we get to role play letting baby know it’s Christmas Eve. The ladies discuss the fetish line drawn in the sand and the specificity of some fetishes. Carla shares how she longs to be the last Saab owner in the whole world. Delia launches into the intriguing world of Santa porn and how Porn Hub caters to every flavor of Santa Porn. She proclaims her writerly love for porn titles and finds the production value of Christmas porn spectacular, while Carla in a quick google search finds 303 million results for Christmas porn. The gals are urging people to proclaim Merry Christmas! Since we are saying so many other things being the godless liberals we are. The girls touch on the Baby It’s Cold Outside debate with an eye towards women taking responsibility for their sexual appetites and saying, “Yeah baby, it is cold outside. Let’s sit pants less under a blanket near the fire. Delia ponders the question of sex at the parent’s house while visiting for the holiday season and Carla tackles this question head on with a charming memory visiting her long distance lover. The girls discuss foreplay and Delia comes out as someone who might have a particular fetish regarding everything sparkly this holiday season. Do not let this lady in a Big Lots or Michaels! A Sexy Santa on Amazon yields more than 8000 hits for costumes and sexual play things. And the two words that stop Carla in her tracks. Clown. Porn. Delia argues against the Santa uniform fetish and shares one of her most treasured Comic Con memories as it relates to fetishes. Carla waxes poetic about an interesting stage experience. People are more horny than usual during the holidays and Delia learned about a sub season of the holiday season, cuffing season. The girls share a preview of what’s to come. If you have any fun Christmas memories, please inbox us! On behalf of Land Your Man podcast, have a safe and satisfying holiday season! In This Episode: https://www.thekindland.com/5-strange-christmas-fetishes-617 https://www.vice.com/en_us/article/d3b9qm/santa-is-a-surprisingly-popular-sex-symbo www.pornhub.com www.hallmarkmovies.com *Royalty-Free Music by Kevin MacLeod; Two Finger Johnny 2015.

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